Who is Defining Your Skill Sets?

0:10 - Welcome back to extra shot of leadership. Kimberly K. How are you doing over there?

0:15 - Fantastic. Oh, fantastic. I mean, this is what, middle of March?

0:20 - We are we are the first 2nd week. I think we're a second week of March already.

0:23 - March, counter and feel amazing. Amazing. Yeah.

0:29 - You're still rocking along. Still rocking along. Working your body out.

0:32 - Working that body. Eating my protein. This is the best year that I can remember in a very long time.

0:39 - Oh, man. Yeah. So you're following everything you talked about in that last episode two weeks ago?

0:45 - Like it's a Bible. I'm following it, yeah. I'm hitting the gym six days a week, five days a week. And I am eating a ton of protein, 1 gram of protein per £1 of where you want to be. Typical body weight. Yeah, your desired body weight. And it's amazing the way I just feel alive. I would highly recommend and I would say this when I say six days a week in the gym, I know people are like, oh, yeah, you got to be kidding me. Listen, that doesn't mean it has to be an hour, six days, 15 minutes, 20 minutes, 30 minutes, whatever you can do consistently, that's it.

1:27 - All right. Consistency is key.

1:29 - Consistency is key.

1:30 - Okay, what else is going on with you? It's already march. I know.

1:34 - Can you believe it?

1:35 - I can't believe it.

1:36 - I'm like, where does the time go? But you know what? I'm okay with it. I just fly on by.

1:41 - Yeah.

1:42 - Used to I'd be like, oh, I don't want this year to go by so fast. This one, I'm okay.

1:45 - Just fly on by. Keep on going, trucking. Man, I cannot believe that it is already March. I'm like, here we go. Spring break. Kids are going to be out of school here in the next couple of months, and then your summertime, and it just feels like the years are flying by. I sound like I'm getting a little old.

2:02 - You're not getting old. You just got a lot on your mind. You got a lot to do. So how are you mid March here, man?

2:08 - I'm doing good. I will tell you, this year has been a fantastic year for me. Now, I'm not hitting the gym for my body, but I am hitting the gym for my brain.

2:19 - There you go.

2:20 - Like that.

2:20 - Yeah. You're doing a little muscle therapy upstairs? I am.

2:24 - I'm spending a lot of time in thought and reflection about me, what I'm doing, what I like doing. Just things that I'm here for. Like, what am I here for? It's kind of like this whole meaning of life. It makes me think of Monty Python. Did you ever watch Monty Python? No. You never did?

2:40 - No.

2:41 - That's what it makes me think of. But anyhow, that's a whole nother thing. But I am I'm spending a lot of time and thought about who I am, who I want to be, call it the midlife crisis, call it whatever you want to call it. I woke up this year really thinking about how am I spending my time? And for me, this goes back to our initial conversation in January when it was around priorities and how you're establishing priorities, why those are important. And I go right back to that conversation, and I think about you, and I had an exchange, and I remember vividly talking to you about your priorities for the year and saying to you I said two things to you. The first one that I said was, like, we're not talking about goals. That's really interesting. And then the second thing I remember was, like, work has not hit your priority list. That's also interesting. How does that look? So those two things for me, I've kind of carried on through for the last couple of months thinking about that and really thinking about what are my priorities? How did I establish my priorities? Are they really my priorities? Am I sharing my priorities with my family? What does that look like? And it led me to a conference. I recently went to a conference, very small conference here in town. And it was a little bit of a spur of the moment. Saw it on LinkedIn, I was like, you know what? I'm going to go check out this conference. It looks interesting, and it's for women leaders and understanding a little bit about some of challenges of women leaders in the whole grand scheme of it. Was it anything specific to women? I don't know that I would say that it was. I think it's a conversation for all leaders in my mind. But one of the things that left me thinking about right, I'm kind of putting together all of these little things that I'm thinking about in this year was there was a comment or a discussion around skill sets. And what I heard in the conversation, I think I've, since then morphed in my own head, and it's got me thinking about it. And what it is, is an inventory of skill sets. And my question that I've been ruminating on thinking a little bit about is, have I done an inventory of my own skill set? And I would say, no, I don't think I have. I don't think that I've really sat down and thought about what have I done over my career and what are some of my major accomplishments? But not just accomplishments. This is not about a resume. And I know I'm doing a lot of talking, and I love the eyes that you're listening.

5:24 - I'm over here.

5:25 - Hell, are we going?

5:26 - No, I'm just listening because I'm like, okay, I'm following you.

5:29 - All right. Yeah. This is not a resume conversation. This is really, for me, a conversation of what are all of the things I can go do? What can I do today? If somebody called me, what would I be called for? Am I called for problem solving? Am I called for facilitating? I'm in the training organization and a development organization. So those are some skill sets that I need. But have I ever really sat down and done an inventory of that? This is not a personality assessment, right? There's disks, disk and strings, finders and all that. This is what am I known for? I also don't see this as a brand conversation. I'm not talking about brand. What am I known for? What, can I go out right now and just knock it out of the park? Have you ever done that for yourself? Have you ever sat down and written down your skill sets?

6:23 - I think I remember doing something like this when I first was started with this company and it must have been a class, right, that came to our location and there was I can't even remember what I was, but I do remember having to go, well, what are my skills? But for me at the time, I could not engage and it just seems so complicated. I was like, what are you all talking about? Can you just boil it down and make it easy? So I would say I probably walked out of there not doing anything different with that, not thinking anything different of it. And so I can't say that I've ever done it well or done it to where it would stick, where I'm aware of it now. But there have been conversations with it wasn't an inventory, but there would be conversations with a leader that was like, you're really good at this, or I appreciate this, or I need you in the room because you do this. And those kind of highlighted some of my skills, but not necessarily a skills inventory test type thing.

7:34 - So I guess my follow on question is, okay, so I haven't done it either. Right. It really just got me thinking around number one, I'd never really heard of that. Right. Writing down what I'm known for or what I'm good at. The second thing it got me thinking a little bit about is why haven't I? Right, sure, it can be well, you know what? You've never heard of it. You never did it. It kind of bugged me. I am not quite sure why it did, but it's kind of gotten in my crawl that I haven't done that and it started to lead. I'm curious your thoughts on this kind of your reaction to this line of thinking that I have. But it led me down this idea and this path that am I allowing others to create my own inventory? Yeah, so, like when the boss says.

8:28 - You're really good at this and so you're falling into the box that they're putting in you're like, but wait, I have other skills. So?

8:38 - Yeah. I don't know. That's just been a little bit of my reaction around this idea. And of course that then leads me to the next question. What is it about me that I am allowing that to happen? And I'm kind of sitting there going, am I the only one who hasn't done a freaking skills inventory?

8:57 - Well, and I wonder. So let's just say you were offered one. And if I haven't done it or whatever, because I think I've heard of these skills inventory tests, but I've just never signed up for it. So that makes me wonder why. And my gut reaction is, well, because no matter what you give me, I'm going to figure it out and I'm going to muscle it to the ground. So if I don't have the skill, I'm going to go find somebody who does and someone's going to help me with this.

9:29 - That in and of itself is a skill. Right? I would call that probably some level of commitment or resiliency, some perseverance.

9:36 - Yeah, something grit.

9:38 - All of those things you're like. I will persevere, I will figure it out. Yeah.

9:43 - But I can see how it would be helpful to have a list of your skills so that you can think differently about what are you doing, what do you want to do, what else could you be good at? Maybe I'm really good at this, but maybe I could be really good at something else because I have those transferable skills or whatever.

10:04 - Yeah, I can take this. Let's go back to grit. Right? I can take this grit and I can really leverage it in a lot of different ways. It can show up and be beneficial in a lot of different places. So it's been a long two weeks for me. I haven't necessarily gotten pen to paper yet. I started with it. Number one, I'm still chewing on why has it taken me so long to think about this? What is it about my own personality that I'm almost looking for others to validate what I am good at versus me saying, no, this is what I'm good at. So that's one thing that I'm continuing to think a little bit about. I think the second thing for me is, okay, how has goals and setting goals connected to my skills inventory? So I think historically for me, I've been very focused on goals. I even go back to some of our previous episodes.

11:06 - Goals, goals, goals, goals, goals.

11:07 - Yes, very much. It's like, let's go, let's get the next goal. The next goal. The next goal. Just going back to what you just said, it's like, this is what I am good at. Here are my skills that I know I'm good at. They're transferable can be utilized in many different ways and I'm also wanting to be known for. And I don't know that I would call that a goal, but I would call it maybe it's more of a future. This is what I want to be known for.

11:41 - Your identity?

11:43 - That's a good question. It's like, this is what I want to be called. For I want to be called because I'm really good at X and I'm not looking for fame or fortune.

11:53 - It's not even like high recognition or anything. That's what I want to be good at, and that's what I want people.

11:59 - To know that I'm good at. Yes. So a lot of this and I know we're kind of just swirling around in circles. I think the other thing that I'm thinking a little bit about is layering on all of these conversations that you hear about. Right. And I talked a little bit about Brand. You have your resume, your accomplishments, you now have this skills inventory, and you also have this additional piece of what do I want to be known for? I don't know how to put it all together. I'm curious if you have any just hey, look, when I think about all of that, here's how I wrap it up for me.

12:36 - Mercy, that's deep.

12:43 - I came in today, I've been thinking a lot.

12:45 - Obviously, I'm like and I just told. You, I said, let's just get on. There and chitchat it out because you've got something in your head. So I would say, I know here's an example of a leader that doesn't have all the answers, right? Yeah, I don't but I think what it would be fun I think it'd be just so fun for us to get in a room and brainstorm it out, just like we would do some type of class development or something like that. If we were trying to help a customer figure this out, we would get in a room and we would brainstorm. Until we figured it out. So I think that would be fun to do. But how to pull it all together?

13:23 - Yeah, I think there's some that I need personally pulling it all together and kind of seeing it all on paper. I'm definitely that visual person. Much more practical. I like to see it and think about it and then edit right. Versus it just kind of swirling in my head. I see value in the whole pen to paper. I mentioned earlier I kind of started to, okay, what do I do well? Right. Facilitator, whatever that means. And I can tie some examples of how I've done that well and experiences that I've had. Right. So there for me is kind of the mapping of accomplishments to a skill. I will tell you one thing that was really interesting as I started with the one, there was a little bit of confidence that started to build for me that I don't know I had room to grow in, truly. I mean, I think I walk around and I think I walk around with a little bit of confidence, a little bit of swagger, and then all of a sudden, I wrote that one thing down and I start to think a little bit about it and I start to put my experiences down again. Past a resume. This is not a resume. I was like, you know what? I'm pretty good at that.

14:42 - Does it feel like you're kind of like you're busting out of the box that somebody else is putting you in, and that's where the confidence is coming from?

14:50 - That's an interesting comment. Busting out of the box, right. That I allowed myself to get put into.

14:56 - Yes.

14:56 - And so I think that just that statement alone for me is I'm feeling as though I'm taking control over things that maybe I've allowed others to have control of. Yes. That's an interesting comment. Yeah.

15:13 - It's kind of like you're setting the walls of the box. You're setting the boundaries of the box. You're determining what that looks like. That is a very freeing place to be. And I remember there was a conversation I had with it was a contractor. You and I both worked with him. And he did this drawing for me. And he looked at me one day because I was just like, what do you need me for? I don't do this. It's not that big of a deal. And he's like, do you realize how unique you are? And I was like, what you talk about? So he drew out this thing, and so he drew these four circles, and he's like, You've got this, and you've got this, and you've got this, and you just got and you have this. He's like, who else do you know in your circle of people anywhere that has that? And I was like, well, nobody.

16:11 - I think it's just me.

16:12 - I think I am unique. Right? And so he just helped me to think about myself differently. Because you're wonderfully unique for a reason, and it takes all these wonderful, unique people to make an organization work. And so what makes me think of this inventory thing that you're talking about or writing this down or mapping this out? How great would that be if a leader could do that for themselves and then help their teams do that?

16:41 - Did you hear that over here? Like, I'm having a candy bar.

16:45 - And then once you have that and you've kind of mapped that out, boy, you can really see where your gaps are for your organization or you're hiring someone new. Like, what gap are we missing over here? And you really look for people with those strengths or skills or whatever. You can really build an organization that way.

17:04 - I find it interesting that it took somebody else to highlight for you what your uniqueness was.

17:11 - Yes, literally. I don't know that I would have come to that probably in the next four, five, six years after that. There might have been a place where I would have started to realize it, but I was early in my career in training, and I was just like and I think that really gave me a confidence boost. When you start to realize so someone doesn't have to do it for you, but when you start to realize I am unique, you really start to gain a different level of confidence with like I bring something unique to the table.

17:50 - Yes. My specific skill set is something that is good. Right. And I don't necessarily mean that it's good as in, oh, you know what? It's good to be that. It's not that. It's more of a you can still kind of hear me processing and thinking about this. And I think at the root of it, for me, it's who is defining me and when will I define myself, when will I take that action to define who I am, what I'm bringing to the table, and how will that make me even perform that much better? Yes.

18:37 - Because then once you have that, there are some people that I could see that once they figure that out or they get that, they're going to be like, well, look at me, right? Sure. But then there's that person that's like, well, who can I go help with this skill? What could I do?

18:55 - What can I share?

18:56 - Share? Yes. To make whatever better. And I can see you doing that. And I think that's where my AHA moment wasn't about, well, check me out. Nobody got this. But it just helped me think, oh, well, that's what I need to bring to the table to go help people, because I really was in a unique position to be able to help two sides of an organization.

19:22 - So it's interesting. I was listening to your earlier comment about the I heard you say the circles. Right. So my head is going to, what could this look like? Earlier I asked, how do you meld your accomplishments with your skills, with kind of who you want to be? A little bit of aspirational? I like the idea of circles, and perhaps the circles are major competencies or skill sets that you own, and then inside that little circle or that bubble is some supporting information. But I really love this idea of boosting confidence that to me, is like the what would that look like? Is that something that I need? Do I need my confidence boosted? You can hear for me, this year has been a very eye opening experience for a number of reasons, just a number of interactions that I've had and conversations that I've had. But it cultivated in this conference around yeah. Do you know what you bring to the table? Do you know what you're good at and how do you talk about you? And I think for far too long, I've allowed myself to be a little lazy in that space. It's kind of like, oh, my work speaks for itself. It's a funny kind of line of thinking. Yeah.

20:40 - It's not necessarily me and my skills. It's look at all this work.

20:43 - Exactly.

20:44 - Look at the work. Look at the work versus look at what I bring to the table for you and what else I can do for you? Yes.

20:51 - All right, so I think go ahead. Do you have a question?

20:53 - No, I don't have a question. I just was just thinking about so if we go back to the leader can do this, the leader could do this with their team. But just think then what? I mean, what could happen if your entire team has this level of confidence in their skills and what they bring to the table and when they show up for a meeting and why they're there and how they're going to help whatever's going on in that meeting. I mean, I just think you could just be rock stars.

21:21 - Yeah. There is definitely a level of certainty around what I'm bringing to the table and what I'm known for that. I think everybody on the team, they kind of have this I don't know, this skill purpose. Yeah. This purpose. This purpose, this attribute that they're bringing to the team, to the organization, and feel empowered to utilize it.

21:46 - Yes. And not feel threatened because someone else's skill is different. And you're not like that, but you're still highly valuable because you bring this. And that's why we have these seven people in the room, because everybody brings something different. I'm telling you, that's good stuff right there.

22:03 - So I think I'm going to work on over the next couple of weeks, I think I'm going to work on a framework. I think I'm going to work on a framework. I'm going to put something to paper, and I'm going to work on identifying these skill sets. Right. I'm going to make my own little inventory, and I'll report back at some other time. I love it. Going to be anytime soon, but it'll.

22:23 - Describe it just like we used to do with the three column thing. So we can just bring it back and describe it and what does it look like and what leaders do with it.

22:32 - Yeah. What did it do for me personally and what can it do for me as a leader in an organization?

22:37 - I like it. I think this is a very interesting conversation. I think the listeners are probably on the other end going, what did just happen? What do you want me to do now? Nothing. I think that for you and I, we just we like to sometimes chat things out.

22:53 - Yeah. I think ultimately the question that I would have for anybody listening is, have you ever done one? And if you have, I would love to see it, send it to me. I would like to know why you did it or why haven't you done it? How did it help you? How did it help you? Right. I think I have just so many questions, honestly, about this idea, and did I just hear some silly buzzword thing at a conference? And am I walking away thinking, am I walking away from that conference, spending mental energy on something that you think is silly? Right or not? Value add to your own personal story. Yeah, sounds very like woo woo.

23:45 - I think when people walk away, because I bet you I'm going to be walking away today, driving home today thinking about, so what are my skills? What box have I been in? What does my own box look like? Let's just say I'm going to create my own box now and let me define my box. What does that look like? And what could I do with that? My wheel is going to be spinning today.

24:09 - So, look, those of you who are listening think this is woo woo. I want to know it. I want you to tell me. Whatever you're talking about this week is baloney. I want to know those of you who are like, that's really interesting. I want to hear it on LinkedIn. Let me know. Send us an email. You got our contact. We'd like to hear directly from you.

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